Bertie Browns Blog

We thought we got asked silly things........

Tue, 15 Nov 2011 18:27:12 PST

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We thought we got asked some wierd questions at Bertie Browns until we saw this.....

These were posted on an Australian Tourism Website and the answers are the actual responses by the website officials,who obviously have a great sense of humour!

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Q: Does it ever get windy in Australia? I have never seen it rain on TV, how do the plants grow? (UK).

A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.
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Q: Will I be able to see kangaroos in the street? (USA)

A: Depends how much you've been drinking.
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Q: I want to walk from Perth to Sydney - can I follow the railroad tracks? (Sweden)

A: Sure, it's only three thousand miles, take lots of water.
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Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Australia? Can you send me a list of them in Brisbane, Cairns, Townsville and Hervey Bay? (UK)

A: What did your last slave die of?
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Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Australia? (USA)

A: A-Fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe.
Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the Pacific which does not
... Oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Kings Cross. Come naked.
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Q: Which direction is North in Australia? (USA)

A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.
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Q: Can I bring cutlery into Australia? (UK)
A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do...
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Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA)

A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is
Oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Kings Cross, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.
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Q: Can I wear high heels in Australia? (UK)
A: You are a British politician, right?
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Q:Are there supermarkets in Sydney and is milk available all year round? (Germany)

A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter/gatherers.
Milk is illegal.
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Q: Please send a list of all doctors in Australia who can dispense rattlesnake serum. (USA)

A: Rattlesnakes live in A-meri-ca which is where YOU come from.
All Australian snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and make good pets.
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Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Australia, but I forget its name. It's a kind of bear and lives in trees. (USA)

A: It's called a Drop Bear. They are so called because they drop out of Gum trees and eat the brains of anyone walking underneath them.
You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking.
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Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can sell it in Australia? (USA)

A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.
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Q: Do you celebrate Christmas in Australia? (France)

A: Only at Christmas.

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Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA)

A: Yes, but you'll have to learn it first

How to Fit a Trollbeads Bracelet

Sun, 18 Sep 2011 22:37:15 PDT

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To choose the correct bracelet length, first measure the smallest part of your wrist, e.g. 17cm, and then add 1cm to determine the actual chain length. In this case you would need to purchase an 18cm bracelet. Choose from the drop down box to select your size.

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You will then need to select a Trollbead lock, this will add another 2cm to the length of your bracelet. This additional slack will allow for your bracelet to remain comfortable as more beads are added and your own personal Trollbeads story begins to unfold.

However, please be aware that the more intricate Trollbeads Big Flower Lock and Big Fish Lock are 3cm in length, as opposed to the other locks that are 2cm in length.

Everyone here agrees that as a general 'rule of thumb' you should be able to fit either two or three fingers between your Trollbeads bracelet and your wrist to ensure that the bracelet is not too tight, thus putting too much pressure on the Trollbeads lock. As a precaution we would always recommend that you purchase a Trollbeads Silver Stopper and/or a Trollbeads Safety Chain to keep your Trollbeads charm beads safely in place just in case!!

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Friendship Bracelet Offer

Thu, 01 Sep 2011 01:02:48 PDT

We just LOVE these new limited edition leather friendship bracelets from Trollbeads. For �94 you get a gorgeous leather bracelet,a silver lock, a silver charm and a FREE silver bracelet in the same size as the leather bracelet (worth �34). Perfect as a gift for a special friend or as a well deserved treat for yourself! It's also a great way to start off your Trollbeads collection and save money.

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Choose from a selection of 6 gorgeous colours of leather bracelets ( available in sizes 34 & 38cm):

Black leather with silver heart print charm

Brown leather with silver lucky knot charm

Red leather with silver music box charm

Beige leather with silver mocha charm

Green leather with silver elephant charm

Blue leather with silver hugging hearts charm

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Stylish and affordable!

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Launch of our new website

Mon, 27 Jun 2011 20:44:21 PDT

We are overly excited ( & positively giddy) about the launch of our brand new & utterly gorgeous website!

So what has changed? The first thing you will notice is that the design & navigation of the site has changed dramatically. The mega drop down menus allow you to search by type, by material or by brand of jewellery. Once in a category, you can further refine your search by colour. These new features help you find that fab piece of jewellery even quicker than before!

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If that wasn't enough the beautiful still life & lifestyle photography, with zoom features, let you see the stunning jewellery in intricate detail. We have also added images of the jewellery worn on a model (one of the Bertie Babes) to let you see what the jewellery actually looks like on ( also helps you judge length & dimension of jewellery).

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Start looking around & you will see lots of other new features too. Once you pop a few things in your shopping bag, little thumbnails of the products appear in a banner along the top of the page. We LOVE this feature as it saves clicking back to see what you have got!

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To further help you with your shopping, the new site includes detailed size guides & advice regarding gemstones, metals as well as information regarding birthstones.

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The feature that we are really really really excited about is LiveChat. This feature gives you the option to have a personal shopping service & chat live online to one of our experienced staff at the click of a button ( sooo clever!)

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Finally, you will also be able to keep up to date with our latest news, gossip and style tips via our popular facebook page and blog ( how cute are the icons set inside little pendants at the bottom of the page!)

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We all hope you love the new website as much as we do so please have a good old browse and let us know what you think!

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